Thursday, May 6, 2010

Mrs.

I was taught that "Mrs." was the title given to married women. "Miss" was for unmarried women, and of course, "Ms." was for all women. I don't get hung up on titles. I seldom use "Rev." I am known by my first name, even by the youngest children in our congregation. If I were to use something, it would be "Ms." I feel too old to be called "Miss" and I've never been married.
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Living in a very conservative community, I think the whole county knows that an unmarried woman with a biracial adopted daughter is pastor in Tiny Village. Our story is known In other words, it is known that I am not "Mrs." Today, I got a call from the woman who is filling in at the gift shop. She called me "Mrs."
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I don't correct people, but I do get tired of the assumption that I must be married. I have decided that in this county, "Mrs." means "mom." Throughout Daughter's school years, school people who needed to make contact with me would call me "Mrs." Do people no longer remember the distinctions? If they're not sure, why can't they use "Ms.?"
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Daughter's blood sugar was a little high at lunch, and she is complaining about feeling weak. The sub is in panic mode. I assured her Daughter is fine. I suggested Daughter was testing her. She then told me that there had been several outbursts this morning. That would certainly set Daughter off. Sub is going to be there 2 more days. I hope she calms down. The people at the gift shop are there for the peace that comes with a smaller group. It sounds like Sub is transmitting her anxiety to everyone.
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My rant for the day. "Mrs." was my mother. I'm not my mother.

3 comments:

maeve said...

and Mrs. W was my mother-in-law and I'm certainly not my mother-in-law. I know why you get annoyed with this stuff. I haven't been Mrs. for decades, although my husband died only six years ago. I hated the Mrs. thing. It's discriminatory. Do the guys change their title after they get married? All women should just be Ms. We should just eliminate Mrs. from the language.

maeve said...

Not only that but in my next life, if I'm not a nun, I'll keep my original name or ask the potential husband to take mine. A hyphenated version for both of us would be OK as well.

Reverend Mom said...

I recently had a wedding where the bride kept her maiden name. She was established in her profession under that name. We had a discussion about how I should introduce them. We didn't want to emphasize her nontraditional choice (which had cause quite a stir), but we also didn't want to use his name. We finally decided on the "his surname family: his name and her name."