Thursday, November 10, 2011

Found: A Black Hole

I opened the drawers in Daughter's dresser this afternoon and discovered the black hole into which socks, napkins, washcloths, and various other small items vanish. I couldn't believe what all I found in there.... I took a laundry basket in and emptied them into it, and then brought it into the family room to sort. It was fun sorting through the socks, some of which were dirty.
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I was amazed, because I thought I'd been supervising her pretty closely when she pulls the whites out of the dryer. As always, though, my attempts to teach her how to do things properly only result in her learning how to be even sneakier.
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Her furniture is all in the living room, ready to be picked up by the guys at 10:00 tomorrow morning. I think there are 4 men coming to move a dresser, twin bed, desk, wicker chair and a few boxes. I think their real motivation is the opportunity to go out to lunch when they're done with the work. Whatever it is, I'm grateful for their support.
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As I anticipated, she had a difficult time this evening. She doesn't want to take any furniture. I offered to take her to choir to give her a break, but she wanted to stay and work with me. The problem was she was quickly overwhelmed, and when she's overwhelmed, I become her target. In the end, she did most of the things I asked her to do.
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The reports from elsewhere are that she is very excited about moving and really looking forward to it. I'm glad to hear those reports, because all I hear is how frightened she is, how terrible this place is, and how wrong it is of me to kick her out like this. I keep telling her that moving is hard, and she'll be okay. I told her the schedule for the next week-- I'll pick her up for worship on Sunday. After lunch we'll go serve a meal at a soup kitchen, and then come back to the house to hang out for a while before she goes back to the group home. Thursday the bus will drop her off here, and after choir she'll spend the night with me, going from here to her program on Friday. Next Saturday we're going to a college football game, just to see it, not to work in the concession stand. She'll spend the night here then, too. I look forward to life getting easier....
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I've done all I can to make this move easier on her. All her acting out has done is make me more determined to move her out. I look forward to having a peaceful home. Yesterday I reorganized the linen closet, and celebrated the fact that it will stay that way, since Daughter will no longer be cramming things into it. I anticipate having a lot more energy when I no longer have her venom spewed at me. It will also be nice not to find her surprises-- like the black hole that had been sucking up things she didn't want to deal with. It will be interesting to see if they can get her to be more responsible. It will also be interesting to see what she does to try to get kicked out.

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