The Rest of the Day

Daughter called me this afternoon with a story about how sick she was and how much she was suffering. Her blood sugar had been on the low side of normal at lunch. She'd fallen in the restroom. She'd started to hyperventilate. I listened, reminded her that she needed to distract herself with music and told her to get her ipod. Then I asked, "Who are you going to call after you move out?" I could tell that shook her up a bit.

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When she got home, I asked her if she wanted close supervision or to practice being independent. She chose independence and immediately decided she was cooking supper. I bit my tongue and worked hard at staying out of the kitchen as she fried canned chicken (yes, cooked canned chicken) and burned potatoes. I reminded her she had to figure out carbs and insulin, which she did a fairly decent job of calculating. She also made pudding, which wasn't supposed to be tapioca.

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I forced myself to eat a little bit, but it was hard with everything cold and shiny with grease. The potatoes were black on the outside and uncooked on the inside. It was bad. Even she acknowledged it was bad. She continues to insist she's moving out. Flasher's dad will handle the cooking.

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She is very withdrawn. I think she's backed herself into a corner and feels trapped. I told her I wouldn't make her move out, and she was welcome to stay here. After supper and trying to wash the dishes, she disappeared upstairs, not to be heard from since. I think she went up and fell asleep. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to wake her up so she can take her night time pills and insulin and check her blood sugar for a bedtime snack. It's too dangerous not to take care of her diabetes before bedtime, or I'd let her sleep. I'm going to remind her that she needs to get herself up in the morning.

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I am somewhat surprised that she has continued to insist she's moving in with Flasher. I didn't think her determination would last through the day. It's going to get harder to patiently wait her out. I don't know what I'll do if she really does try to move out-- that would be scary!