Monday, April 25, 2011

Sight Seeing

I got a text from Daughter this morning. She said Birth Brother had changed and wasn't himself and she didn't want to have anything to do with him. I responded by pointing out that she hadn't seen him since he was a child, so she really didn't know what he was like. I told her we'd talk about it this evening.

So this evening I asked what his great sin had been. She called him this morning, and he was talking about how he wished he lived closer to us so that he could see her and take her bowling. She also acknowledged she'd made a mistake contacting him. I feel sorry for BB. Daughter is calling him constantly, but then rejecting him.

The same thing happened when she talked to birth mother. She wants to check them out, like a tourist attraction. She wants to satisfy her curiosity. She doesn't want emotional engagement with them. She's on a sight seeing tour, and is determined to remain in control of the relationship.

I pointed out that she was sending him mixed messages-- calling him, but then not wanting to see him. She commented that she has problems with relationships with men. Yes, she does.

The good news is she's talking to me about these things. I asked her today what caused her to change her attitude and become cooperative. She said she didn't know. I'm going to enjoy it for however long it lasts. Before we headed out for my evening meeting (she stayed at the home of one of the saints), we played a game of cards. She beat me. It was a pleasant evening with her.


maeve said...

I love the "sight seeing" description. Miss K does it too, periodically. Her mom surfaces and she communicates just to check it out and then stops.

I stopped a long time ago, just after I crossed the Bridge of Enough. Mean, huh? Maybe, but now I'm sane, at least sorta'.

Reverend Mom said...

I just don't get it-- I guess it's another symptom of their RAD tendencies....