"I'm Too Ashamed."

Tuesday night Daughter begged me to let her finish watching a show on her computer at bedtime. I refused, since she had not gotten up in the morning. She threatened to get up and finish it in the middle of the night. I hid the computer in my (locked) bedroom.

Yesterday evening I went to the warehouse club and bought a new lawn mower. I wasn't going to buy a self-propelled one, but it was all they had, so I did. Looking at the weather forecast, I decided I'd best mow when we got home. I asked Daughter to help by trimming. She insisted she'd rather work in the house. I told her she needed to put away the clean laundry, clean the half bath, and take care of trash and recycling. As I was finishing the mowing, she came out and announced she'd done all her chores and wanted her computer back. She wanted the keys to go get it. I informed her I'd get it out when I was done with the lawn. I told her she'd get it faster if she did either the sweeping or trimming while I did the other. She turned and ran into the house. For a brief moment I had hopes she was getting a broom. I always have hope.

After I finished, I discovered she hadn't taken the trash or recycling to the curb. I made three trips to take all of it out. I went into the house, exhausted. She was sitting in a recliner with her feet up petting Kitten. "How does it feel to use your new lawn mower?"

"I'm exhausted! I just had to do the entire lawn by myself and now I'm having to finish your chores."

Her bedroom was a mess (again), so I told her to go pick up the dirty clothes and trash on her floor. She stormed into her room and laid down on the floor. She refused to do anything the rest of the evening, including making her bed. Her reason? "I'm too ashamed." I suggested she could turn it around by doing something, but she'd rather wallow.

This afternoon she saw Psychiatrist. She was mad about having to go. Psychiatrist said group home needs to happen sooner rather than later. She suggested looking into a home that specializes in borderline personality disorder (there is one here in Capital). It's full now, but we will watch for an opening. She also tweaked the medication some. When we got home, Daughter went in and cleaned her room-- without any prompting from me. I'll take it.