I have come to a difficult decision. It is time to begin looking for an out of home placement for Daughter. The power struggle with her is taking too big a toll on me. I am exhausted, and my health is suffering. I told Daughter, who was quite distressed. "I never thought about what my behavior was doing to you." I was in tears as I talked to her about it. I told her I'd still be her mom, and would still see her lots, but it was time for a change. Therapist helped her make a list of the pros and cons of moving out, and she decided there are more pros than cons.
I went out to do a visit this afternoon, and left my cell phone in the car. She freaked out when I wasn't answering. She called Administrative Assistant, who assured her I'd be back to get her.
I registered her for a camp for special needs adult camp in early June back before Christmas. I haven't heard anything since I got the receipt, so I sent off an email yesterday asking about the status of her registration. I have yet to get an answer. Last year they lost at least one registration from someone connected with the church. I'm trying not to panic. I want that week break from her. They added a second special needs camp this year because the first one filled up so quickly last year.
I've received an invitation to join a peer support group that has overnight meetings 5 times a year. They have a meeting coming up in early May. I'm meeting with Case Manager next week. I've told her I want respite for that night and I want to discuss other living options for Daughter. She told me Daughter is going to be tough to place. She's high functioning, but needs tight supervision. I asked about accessing resources through her psychiatric diagnoses. Case Manager will look into that. It could take a couple of years to get her into the right place, but it's time to begin moving forward with this. It's past time.