Wednesday, February 15, 2012

I Hope She Is Lying

Two phone calls from Daughter this evening. The first came at about 4:50. "Mom, can I take my pill now so I can eat? All the other women have eaten supper, but they won't let me eat because it isn't 5:00." I told her she could take her pill and eat, the important thing wasn't the time, but taking it with her meal. I was annoyed, because they had just explained that the women never eat until 5:30 or 6:00, and I found myself wondering if they were punishing Daughter for the concerns we have been raising by making her watch the other women eat while she waited because they had to follow doctor's orders.
The second call came later. She told me she had a headache and was saying things she shouldn't say because she was irritated and tired from the lows she'd had earlier. "Lows? What happened?"
She proceeded to tell me a story of her blood sugar dropping to 63 on the van ride home. She said she told the staff member her blood sugar was low, and she needed food. Staff told her they'd be home in 15 minutes and she could talk to whoever was cooking. When they got home, she checked again. Her blood sugar was 62. She informed them she needed food. Again she was told to talk to whoever was in the kitchen. She said she was low and needed something right then. She said they finally gave her some orange juice and asked her what they should do next. Her blood sugar came up, and she explained she needed to eat her supper. The said she had to wait for 5:00 so she could take her pill.
She said, "Mom, if they don't even know how to handle a low, how can I trust them to if I have a big problem with my diabetes?" Good question. I hope she is lying. I'm afraid she's telling the truth.
I congratulated her on speaking up for herself and being a good advocate. I sent emails off to the team. I think I need to talk to Case Manager tomorrow. If the story is true, I'm going to explore filing a complaint with the state licensing bureau. Oh, and she reports that supper the last two nights has been baked beans and hot dogs. I'm sure that's on the menu the dietitian provided. NOT.


Jane said...

Oh, I so hope that it's not what Maeve suggested, that the staff are deliberately sabotaging Daughter. But, in my experience, it's not impossible that they wish you would shut up and go away. Maybe they would prefer that you were like the families that express the attitude, once their family member is in a residential placement, "Okay, don't bother us, just let us know when she dies." (This actually happens.)

Reverend Mom said...

I hope so, too. Maeve is very wise, and while she sees me as an advocate, I'm sure they view me more as a pest. People don't like being called on failing to do their jobs. I was looking up state licensing requirements this evening, and noticing that the most recent licensing reports are not available on-line. I'll see what response I get to my most recent concerns tomorrow. I asked Daughter about the low blood sugars when she called, and she says her meter will back her up. I was hoping she'd back down....

Anonymous said...

I'm wondering it there are blood glucose meters that would register daughter's data and automatically send it to a website which you could access, with date and time? I seem to recall some sort of system like that. Might be helpful if it ends up being your word against theirs, although we hope not. lifting you up, Rachel in SL

Reverend Mom said...


I haven't heard of that. I know there are meters that can be downloaded to computers via a cable. If there were a meter that sent the data to the internet, it would probably require wireless, which the house doesn't have.

They are supposed to be faxing me blood sugars weekly. I will be looking at the memory in her meter tonight.