My "date" stood me up. Her first grandchild was born prematurely today. I guess that's a legitimate excuse. I went alone. I went to a pizza buffet, and pre-concert lecture about the music, and then the concert. It was wonderful.
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Daughter sat in the study and listened and I called several people, seeing if there was someone else who would like to go with me. It was interesting to watch her. She didn't say anything, but I could tell it was bothering her. I observed that it must be hard, watching me look for someone to go with me, and knowing she couldn't go. I said it was too bad she'd told me she didn't want to go, and she probably hadn't wanted me to take her seriously and leave her home. She looked down, and acknowledged I was right.
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I got a text at bedtime-- Daughter's blood sugar was sky high. I knew immediately what had happened. I had been very clear that she could not be alone in the kitchen. She was alone in the kitchen. She got in the refrigerator. She had to do two chores to watch TV. She told the aide she'd done them. She didn't. But her lie earned her TV for the evening.
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There is a retreat for women clergy coming up at the end of the month, and I have been considering getting respite and going, but now I wonder. If the supervision is so lacking for a single evening, how can I leave for 2 days? I'll talk to Therapist about it tomorrow. For now, I'm going to enjoy the memories of a wonderful evening.
3 comments:
I'm glad you had a nice evening out despite what happened at home. I would have gone with you if you had called me! :-)
~Kari
P.S. Get respite. Go to the retreat. Put on your own oxygen mask first.
You should go to the retreat. Get respite coverage for your daughter and be VERY CLEAR about the danger to her health if she is allowed to be alone in the kitchen even for a moment. Ditto with the chores. Tell the respite worker to check and make sure she did what she was supposed to. Some people don't realize that people like your daughter can and do lie. They think they're sweet little innocents but in many ways they're just like anyone else and if they see a chance to get away with something they'll go for it.
I used to teach autistic kids and I worked weekends at the school providing respite. I saw a lot of amazing things during my time there and I noticed that the more information we had about our students the better we were able to anticipate trouble and keep them safe and relatively happy.
Please. Go to the retreat.
You are both right. I'm asking for respite so I can attend the retreat.
Miz Kizzle,
Sometimes I feel like I have explained this until I am blue in the face. It's just hard for them to grasp Daughter's issues. I'm going to post the email I just sent about the situation.
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