Friday, October 28, 2011

I Shut Her Up

Daughter is understandably anxious about the move, which has made her very needy emotionally. She has become a Cling-on again. Last night she decided she needed to stay home and help me today. I said no, but refused to engage further as she ranted and raved. She went to bed last night, and I thought the argument was over.
When I woke her up this morning, her first words were, "I'm not going!" She informed me she knew I had a lot of work to do today and she was going to stay home and help me. I said, "Your 'help' comes with shouting and an attitude that wears me out." She stopped shouting. She tried again before she left. I told her that I love her, and when she is stressed she sneaks food and gets grouchy and it's hard work to watch her every move and deal with her attitude. She said, "That's part of why you are sending me away." I didn't respond. She's right, it is part of the reason why it's time for her to move out.
Last night I was depressed. This is going to be hard. I know it's time. I know it's the right thing to do. I know all that, and I am going to miss her. For 21 years, much of my life has revolved around her needs. Life will be easier when it isn't a daily balancing act to juggle the demands of ministry and parenting her. It will also be emptier. I promised her we'd have fun together this evening and tomorrow.

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