Last night I took Daughter with me to a meeting at a church 25 miles from here. She was very patient until the last half hour or so (the meeting last 2 1/2 hours). For the last half hour she was kneeling beside me with her arms wrapped around me. So after this display of dependency we got in the car and headed home. In a couple of months she will turn 23. "Mom, I just want 2 things for my birthday." Already I was filled with dread. Her gift lists are never realistic. A couple of years ago she wanted me to take her and a couple of friends on a cruise to the Caribbean to celebrate her birthday.
"I want a place of my own and to adopt a child."
The rest of the drive home was taken up with gentle reminders that the last time we had the conversation about her living independently we had decided to wait at least a year before even discussing it again because every time we have the conversation she acts out to show us she can't live independently. I pointed out that before she could live independently she needed to be able to stay home alone and be safe for a couple of ours. As we were having this conversation, I was wondering if this kind of grandiose thinking might be the beginning of a manic phase. I convinced myself I didn't need to worry-- yet.
She was 90 minutes late getting to bed last night. I told her she could take her shower this morning, dreading the battle to get her out of bed and moving after a short night. When I got up at 6:30 this morning and called her, she had been up for an hour. She had showered, washed, her hair, and even put the shampoo and conditioner away. Maybe I do need to worry....