Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Creating New Traditions

Daughter told me this morning how much she is dreading Christmas without Grandma and Grandpa. "It just won't be the same without them." I agreed it would be different, and then asked her what wouldn't change. She talked about being with family. I reminded her that both Grandma and Grandpa were better off now, as their health had gotten so bad in recent years. I reminded her of good memories. My parents would come once a year and stay with Daughter so I could go to some continuing ed event. They stayed with her for over a week in 2000 while I went to Israel. She smiled and remembered how they had spoiled her.
Dad loved to cook, and he loved to cook his children and grandchildren's favorite foods. So, every time we went to visit, he would make sausage gravy and biscuits for Daughter. She laughed and talked about how she'd want more and I'd tell her no and Grandpa would tell her yes. He didn't care that it was making it hard for me to figure out her insulin, or that she would run high all day as a result, she wanted more, and she should have more.
We are not going to be with family for New Year's Eve this year. That is one thing that will not be the same. We decided, though, that on New Year's morning I would make sausage gravy and biscuits for Daughter. We will do that to honor the memory of Grandpa. We will create new traditions that honor the memory of my parents. I may even allow her to have more when she asks. That's what Dad would want.


Anonymous said...

I was going to suggest creating some new traditions. When I was growing up, my grandma was always at our house for Christmas. The year she had died, someone invited us to have dinner at their house. Nothing was said about Grandma, but a new tradition for Christmas was created, and it became something to look forward to. KJK

Freddae' said...

My grandmother and best friend passed away in March. It feels like just yesterday when we were celebrating last Christmas. How special it was. I have really been struggling this season to find joy amidst my deep sorrow and grieving, but I know that grandma is with Jesus in heaven and that brings peace and comfort. I'll be praying for your daughter and your family. The first holiday's are always the hardest.

Reverend Mom said...

Thank you both.

Freddae', I pray for you peace in the grief of your grandmother's death. I am feeling more confident about our ability to make new memories and enjoy ourselves this Christmas, and I'm grateful.