Dad does his banking online, and he asked me to go online today to pay a bill that had come in since he's been in the hospital. This is something I often do for him when I'm there, so that didn't surprise or bother me. I got online, and began looking for the appropriate payee, and came across a payment he'd made to an unfamiliar hospital for $12,000. I was fairly confident that I would have known about any hospital services that cost him $12,000 out of pocket, so I began searching for the bill. I found it. It was for blood work for Mom. The bill had been for $120.00. Apparently he forgot to put in the decimal point. He'd paid it a month ago. He hadn't noticed his mistake, even though his checking account had shrunk by $12,000.
I called Brother, who has power of attorney and told him he'd need to get on it. I also mentioned it to Sister. I soon had a call from across the country Sister. She said she'd call and take care of it, and asked for the details. As I went looking for the details, I discovered that he hadn't put the right account number down when he set up the payee information. The hospital received a check from a bill paying service for $12,000 and probably have no idea what account they should credit it to. I told Dad what had happened, and that we were taking care of it. He laughed.
The rest of us were disturbed. If I hadn't gone into pay that bill, and noticed the out of the ordinary payment, I don't know how long it would have taken for it to be discovered, or even if it would have been discovered. How long before one of us has to take over his finances? At what point do we step in and take away his autonomy?
I hope that a new pastoral position will come through for me, and I will be able to move closer to my parents. I hope I will be able to step in and do more for them. I also hope we can keep them safe without taking away their autonomy and independence unnecessarily.
For now, I'm glad to be home. For now, I need to focus on my responsibilities here, especially with regard to worship tomorrow morning.
4 comments:
This is the hard thing--I would come over and "help" my parents with their bills. Since I have experience in medical billing and insurance, it was a good excuse for us all. When my dad could no longer make the connection that he needed to bring the balance forward from the bottom of one page in the register to the top of the next, I took the checkbook home with me. Hugs.
My siblings are not as concerned about the mistake as I was. My hope is that I will find a church and move closer, and then I will offer to take over the bills and such. I'd rather have him make that decision, but I did tell my brother he'd have to keep tabs on things.... It's hard, watching parents lose their independence.
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