Daughter is doing her best to frustrate me this morning. We had fasting blood draws this morning, and she needed a lithium level 12 hours after she took her last lithium. As we headed out she informed me she wasn't walking with the Walk Saint this morning. She had too much to do at home. When I asked her what she had to do at home, she got angry. I reminded her that every Saturday she tells me she's not going to walk, and every Saturday, she walks and has fun.
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Yeah, that's because I'm forced to have fun."
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"Really? Can I learn how to force you to have fun?"
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"No, you have to be (she listed unique characteristics of Walk Saint)."
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Her period started over night, and the doctor had ordered another urinalysis, because the last one showed a lot of protein, but had been contaminated by the fact she was on her period (which I didn't realize when I took her for the tests). I looked over the lab orders (three different orders from two different doctors, each with unique items and common items). I gave the lab all three orders, but asked to hold the urinalysis until she was off her period. The clerk tried to convince me that it didn't matter that she was on her period. I assured her it did, so under protest she ended up giving me a cup to bring home for when she's done with her period.
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After the blood work we went across the street to a diner for breakfast. Daughter sat there pouting. She couldn't eat anything, she was too sick. The low murmur of adult conversation was too loud for her. I asked the waitress to come back 2 or 3 times. Daughter went from not being too sick to eat to wanting the largest breakfast on the menu: 4 eggs, ham, bacon, sausage, potatoes, and toast. I finally convinced her that 2 eggs, one meat, potatoes and toast would be a better choice.
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When the food arrived, she cleaned her plate very quickly, of course. On the drive home she repeated her insistence she wasn't going for a walk this morning. I ignored her. When Walk Saint showed up (with her dog that starts barking with joy when they turn down our street because she gets to see Daughter), Daughter said she wasn't going. I informed her she was. She stormed out the door, yelling at me, "You owe me!"
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Actually, I think I owe Walk Saint. Sister Best Friend gave me a plaque she bought me while she was on vacation. It says, "Spare me the Drama." I think I may use it to beat some sense into Daughter. I had planned to go do some thing fun today, but if she's still in a foul mood when she gets home, we'll be staying home. I'll send her to the basement or her bedroom....
Showing posts with label respite. Show all posts
Showing posts with label respite. Show all posts
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Success!
I had a couple of texts today from program manager. Daughter wasn't feeling good, Daughter was sleeping, should they make Daughter eat.
Daughter didn't call me. She didn't call me all day. When I picked her up to bring her to see Therapist, she was happy. She told me that respite had not gone well. A woman was dropped off in the middle of the night and tried to come sleep in Daughter's room, waking her up. Someone else spent most of the night screaming, making it difficult to sleep.
She asked me to find a different place for her to stay next time. She didn't try to lay a guilt trip on me. She didn't tell me I should never leave her again. She isn't complaining about the need to go back to the church for Bible study. Her therapist was double booked, so she had to wait longer. She didn't complain or protest. She requested Chinese food for supper when we leave, but told me whatever I chose would be fine.
I'm impressed. I'm also very grateful. Maybe we've weathered this storm.
Daughter didn't call me. She didn't call me all day. When I picked her up to bring her to see Therapist, she was happy. She told me that respite had not gone well. A woman was dropped off in the middle of the night and tried to come sleep in Daughter's room, waking her up. Someone else spent most of the night screaming, making it difficult to sleep.
She asked me to find a different place for her to stay next time. She didn't try to lay a guilt trip on me. She didn't tell me I should never leave her again. She isn't complaining about the need to go back to the church for Bible study. Her therapist was double booked, so she had to wait longer. She didn't complain or protest. She requested Chinese food for supper when we leave, but told me whatever I chose would be fine.
I'm impressed. I'm also very grateful. Maybe we've weathered this storm.
R & R
I'm enjoying my R&R: Retreat and Respite.
Daughter called yesterday evening, sounding happy. I shared wonderful conversations about life and ministry with my colleagues yesterday evening. It is a wonderful gift to be able to take this time away to worship and reflect on ministry. I am so grateful that I am no longer isolated, like I was in Tiny Village.
The colleague I saw on the board at the one residential placements is here, and I shared with the group that seeing his face was like a message from God. I realized last night that our small little rooms here at a Catholic retreat center are larger than some of the rooms I have looked at for Daughter.
Another of my colleagues here was at camp the week Daughter was at the high school camp. He said that they brought a special helper in to work with her that week. He said the other campers were good with her, but as I suspected, she really didn't fit in well at the high school camp. Next summer we'll stick to the special needs camps.
We have a program this morning, and then, after lunch, I will head back to the church. I wasn't going to bring my computer with me, but I had some writing I needed to finish for Administrative Assistant last night. I'm going to write one more article for her this morning before I pack up the computer and take it out to the car.
Daughter called yesterday evening, sounding happy. I shared wonderful conversations about life and ministry with my colleagues yesterday evening. It is a wonderful gift to be able to take this time away to worship and reflect on ministry. I am so grateful that I am no longer isolated, like I was in Tiny Village.
The colleague I saw on the board at the one residential placements is here, and I shared with the group that seeing his face was like a message from God. I realized last night that our small little rooms here at a Catholic retreat center are larger than some of the rooms I have looked at for Daughter.
Another of my colleagues here was at camp the week Daughter was at the high school camp. He said that they brought a special helper in to work with her that week. He said the other campers were good with her, but as I suspected, she really didn't fit in well at the high school camp. Next summer we'll stick to the special needs camps.
We have a program this morning, and then, after lunch, I will head back to the church. I wasn't going to bring my computer with me, but I had some writing I needed to finish for Administrative Assistant last night. I'm going to write one more article for her this morning before I pack up the computer and take it out to the car.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Busy Week
I'm in the midst of a very busy week. I can tell it's fall. Daughter is feeling neglected, so I'm being intentional about spending time with her and having her sit next to me for some cuddle time. I'm doing a program at a church on the other side of town at noon today, and then this evening I head out for my retreat after dropping Daughter at respite. She's not happy about it, but is accepting it (at least for right now).
I'm leaving my computer at the church most nights now so that I'm not tempted to continue working in the evening. As a result, my posts may be a bit more sporadic. Things are going well here at the church-- some exciting things are happening and I'm seeing a new openness to new ideas and change. I can see God at work in and through us, and its an exciting time to be involved in ministry here.
I'm leaving my computer at the church most nights now so that I'm not tempted to continue working in the evening. As a result, my posts may be a bit more sporadic. Things are going well here at the church-- some exciting things are happening and I'm seeing a new openness to new ideas and change. I can see God at work in and through us, and its an exciting time to be involved in ministry here.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
A Bad Combination
While Daughter has improved, she still is running on the manic side. She also has a cold. The result has not been pleasant. She's irritable. She doesn't feel good, but she wants to do things. So she went between telling me she was sick to do anything and insisting I had to take her out to do something exciting or let her undertake a big project. It was not fun.
I am concerned about sending her to respite Tuesday. She was sobbing and asking not to go to the new place today. She wondered why she just couldn't go with me. I'm feeling very torn about the whole thing. I wish she were a little more stable. Hopefully she'll be recovering from her cold by Tuesday. Hopefully.
I am concerned about sending her to respite Tuesday. She was sobbing and asking not to go to the new place today. She wondered why she just couldn't go with me. I'm feeling very torn about the whole thing. I wish she were a little more stable. Hopefully she'll be recovering from her cold by Tuesday. Hopefully.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
A Call from Camp
I received a call from Health Officer at camp yesterday evening. She was a little frantic. Daughter had just checked her blood sugar and it was over 400. The meter was reminding them to check for ketones. Daughter had assured HO that the meter is never wrong. I suggested she have Daughter wash her hands and recheck. She did. It was a miracle! Her blood sugar dropped 300 points!
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This camp experience is almost twice as long as the first, and I think Daughter is getting a bit homesick. Daughter called me after the second check. She was very happy to talk to me, and wanted to to know if she could the braids out of her hair. I knew she'd want to take them out before the end of the week. I told her to leave them in and reminded her that she didn't have a brush. I think she's doing pretty well. There weren't as many pictures posted of her today, but there was one of her doing archery. I'm glad I wasn't there to see that (or be a target!)
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This camp experience is almost twice as long as the first, and I think Daughter is getting a bit homesick. Daughter called me after the second check. She was very happy to talk to me, and wanted to to know if she could the braids out of her hair. I knew she'd want to take them out before the end of the week. I told her to leave them in and reminded her that she didn't have a brush. I think she's doing pretty well. There weren't as many pictures posted of her today, but there was one of her doing archery. I'm glad I wasn't there to see that (or be a target!)
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Crazy Day
I started the day with a doctor's appointment. I need to do a better job of taking care of my health. I go back in a month, and hopefully some things will have improved in that time. I go for blood work tomorrow morning. I need to rethink how I structure my time. I can't keep up the current pace long term and be healthy.
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When I got to the church there were a number of people needing time with me. Had a lunch meeting to plan worship and a picnic that involves 4 area churches. Then I went to the hospital to see a woman who had bypass surgery Monday. She is still heavily sedated and on a ventilator, so it was a brief visit. I spoke to her, said a prayer with her, and left.
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There were more pictures of Daughter having fun posted this morning. It's so good to see her happy and relaxed at camp. Now I'm going to go home to do a few things before coming back for a meeting this evening. I'm supposed to go spend tomorrow evening with Sister, but am pondering whether I can take the time. I guess taking the time is part of shifting my priorities and taking care of myself. We'll see.
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As nice as it is to have Daughter off at camp, not having her here really does throw off my routine. Yes, I miss her-- at least a little.
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When I got to the church there were a number of people needing time with me. Had a lunch meeting to plan worship and a picnic that involves 4 area churches. Then I went to the hospital to see a woman who had bypass surgery Monday. She is still heavily sedated and on a ventilator, so it was a brief visit. I spoke to her, said a prayer with her, and left.
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There were more pictures of Daughter having fun posted this morning. It's so good to see her happy and relaxed at camp. Now I'm going to go home to do a few things before coming back for a meeting this evening. I'm supposed to go spend tomorrow evening with Sister, but am pondering whether I can take the time. I guess taking the time is part of shifting my priorities and taking care of myself. We'll see.
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As nice as it is to have Daughter off at camp, not having her here really does throw off my routine. Yes, I miss her-- at least a little.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Wonderful Day
I got to the office before 7:00 this morning and started on all the various things I needed to write. I'd accomplished a lot be the time Administrative Assistant arrived at 9:00, which was good, because from then until I left for a lunch appointment we had a steady stream of people coming through the office. There were some really good conversations with those people.
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The picture of Daughter appeared on the camp's website this morning. I think she is having fun. We were showing that to people coming through the office. She looks so happy and relaxed. Several suggested it would be a good time to take a picture of me, since I also looked happy and relaxed.
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I had lunch with a colleague, and we talked for almost 2 hours. There were supposed to be 6 of us, but only 2 of us showed. He is doing a Wednesday prayer service, which I want to start in the fall. I was asking him questions about how he does it and what works. By the time we left, I had the vision for a space I want to create at the church for use with the prayer service and also small groups I'll be leading the fall. I came back and said something to Administrative Assistant, and we had it all planned out before she left (late, again).
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I told her I don't know which one of us is looking forward to my vacation more-- I think she's looking forward to things being a bit quieter around here. In previous years she's cut her hours in the summer. That hasn't happened yet this summer-- maybe while I'm away.
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I'm excited about the opportunities ahead of us. Have I mentioned recently how much I love my life? Now, though, I need to focus on the things that need to get done before I leave.
Great Meeting
Last night was our monthly board meeting. It was a great meeting. We have revamped meetings, and reports and routine business are now addressed in one motion in a consent agenda at the beginning of the meeting, leaving the majority of the meeting for education and planning for the future. Last night we were done with our meeting in an hour, the shortest meeting we've had since I've been there.
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We discussed an article I'd found on using teams in congregations. At our retreat in January, we had discussed the book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team and identified our weaknesses as a team. The board decided we've made good progress in working as a team and that as a result the congregation is moving forward in exciting ways. The article talked about the importance of looking at the needs of the team when recruiting new members. We decided that at our next meeting we will look at who is rotating off the board and what our needs are for next year and give that information to the nominating committee. That may seem obvious, but it's not something that has ever been done here before.
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One of the board members is on his way to his cabin near Daughter's camp today. He's going to drop her off a flashlight, since that is the one thing we forgot to pack. She will be delighted.
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We discussed an article I'd found on using teams in congregations. At our retreat in January, we had discussed the book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team and identified our weaknesses as a team. The board decided we've made good progress in working as a team and that as a result the congregation is moving forward in exciting ways. The article talked about the importance of looking at the needs of the team when recruiting new members. We decided that at our next meeting we will look at who is rotating off the board and what our needs are for next year and give that information to the nominating committee. That may seem obvious, but it's not something that has ever been done here before.
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One of the board members is on his way to his cabin near Daughter's camp today. He's going to drop her off a flashlight, since that is the one thing we forgot to pack. She will be delighted.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
A Rough Start
Well Daughter's camp experience this time is not getting off to a good start. The health officer called and said Daughter wanted to check her blood sugar. I pointed out that she needed to do that before eating and explained (again) how to determine how much insulin she needed. She called me back a little after 7:00. Daughter had finished her supper, and she was just getting to her for her insulin. She didn't know what to do. I told her to give her insulin based on her blood sugar before supper and the carbs in her meal. But she didn't know what her blood sugar was. I suggested she ask Daughter and check the memory in her meter. I refrained from pointing out that it was really important that she be there to help Daughter with her blood sugar and insulin before meals.
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I got another phone call from someone else at the camp, wanting to know what to do because Daughter's patch had fallen off. She said Daughter said she needed it, and wondered if there was some way to get her another. I pointed out that I sent 2 extra patches to camp with Daughter. I suspect Daughter is picking up on the health officer's lack of confidence and getting anxious. It could be a very long week-- for both of us.
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I got another phone call from someone else at the camp, wanting to know what to do because Daughter's patch had fallen off. She said Daughter said she needed it, and wondered if there was some way to get her another. I pointed out that I sent 2 extra patches to camp with Daughter. I suspect Daughter is picking up on the health officer's lack of confidence and getting anxious. It could be a very long week-- for both of us.
Camp!
I took Daughter back to camp this afternoon. She was excited. The poor nurse was a little overwhelmed. I assured her she could call me, and she already has. Before I left to take her to camp, I put the keys that I normally wear around my neck in the key drawer. The food is now unlocked. It's going to be a busy week. I hope Daughter has a good week at camp. It will be good for her to be away as I work to get everything done before being gone for 4 weeks.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Success!
Daughter didn't want to leave camp. They want her to come back. There is a special needs adult camp, but we'll be at our conference we go to every year that week. The director said she could attend any of the senior high camps if she'd like to. He said she was a joy, and they want her back. She charmed them all. Unfortunately, I don't think any of the camp dates will work with our schedule.
When I picked her up, she didn't want to leave. She cried as she said goodbye to staff. They told me she wrote a hilarious skit for the talent show last night that had them all laughing. She's tired. I expect she'll crash tonight. She said maybe she will be ready to move out. She acknowledged missing my cooking-- but not me. I'm so glad she had a successful week. I may seek if I can tweak the schedule so she can go to another camp. I'll have to see. For tonight, I'm going to enjoy her success.
When I picked her up, she didn't want to leave. She cried as she said goodbye to staff. They told me she wrote a hilarious skit for the talent show last night that had them all laughing. She's tired. I expect she'll crash tonight. She said maybe she will be ready to move out. She acknowledged missing my cooking-- but not me. I'm so glad she had a successful week. I may seek if I can tweak the schedule so she can go to another camp. I'll have to see. For tonight, I'm going to enjoy her success.
Talent Show
From this morning's pictures posted on the camp website, it looks like last night was the camp talent show. Daughter, of course, loves talent shows. Usually she sings and/or dances. It looks like she branched out last night and was involved in a drama. It also looks like she did it with several men. Why am I not surprised? My hope is that it was the counselors she was pursuing this week (very likely). They will be kind to Daughter, but not interested in a relationship. It's not likely she will hurt them.
I pick her up at 4:30 today. It will be good to see her.
I pick her up at 4:30 today. It will be good to see her.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
The Downside of Freedom
Without Daughter here to slow me down, I've been working way too many hours this week. I left the house at 7:00 yesterday morning, and didn't get home until after 9:00 last night. I've made plans to go into the office tomorrow morning, which is supposed to be my day off. Administrative Assistant and I are making two new banners for Pentecost Sunday. I'll post pictures when they're done. The concept is simple, but they are proving to be a bit more time consuming than we anticipated.
While I'm working a lot of hours, I've enjoyed not having to worry about Daughter's needs. I enjoyed the choir party last night. She wasn't hanging on me and bugging me to leave. She wasn't asking for food she knew she couldn't have. It was much more relaxing without her there.
I'm hoping her success at camp will be the confidence boost that will enable her to be more responsible here at home. I hope.
While I'm working a lot of hours, I've enjoyed not having to worry about Daughter's needs. I enjoyed the choir party last night. She wasn't hanging on me and bugging me to leave. She wasn't asking for food she knew she couldn't have. It was much more relaxing without her there.
I'm hoping her success at camp will be the confidence boost that will enable her to be more responsible here at home. I hope.
Camp Pictures
This morning I received a link to pictures that have been taken at camp. It looks to me like Daughter is having a great time!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Freedom
I am so enjoying the freedom to set my own schedule without worrying about Daughter. As I look at how much easier my life is and how much more responsible Daughter is being in caring for her own health needs, I am more convinced that I need to move her into a group home sooner rather than later. I need to let her case manager know that I am ready to start checking out possibilities for Daughter.
Tonight I'm going to the choir's end of the year picnic. I just had a nice long conversation with one of the higher ups in the denomination. It was nice to be able to talk about the good things that are happening and the challenges ahead.
The weather is still dangerously hot, and it's been a good day.
Tonight I'm going to the choir's end of the year picnic. I just had a nice long conversation with one of the higher ups in the denomination. It was nice to be able to talk about the good things that are happening and the challenges ahead.
The weather is still dangerously hot, and it's been a good day.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
A Phone Call from Camp
I had a phone call from Camp Nurse a little while ago. She called me to tell me that Daughter is doing great! CN is just acting as consultant on the diabetes, Daughter is making good choices and managing it herself. She had a low this afternoon, and she managed it.
This evening they had a campfire, and Daughter challenged one of the counselors to a rap contest. According to CN, Daughter won. She said Daughter involved the others and it was a rap about faith. It was very hot today-- heat index was over 100. Daughter got overheated, but recovered.
CN said I am the only parent she called, but she knew I was worried, and she wanted me to know that Daughter is doing great. Tonight, I'm grateful. Tomorrow I won't be anticipating problems, waiting for the phone to ring. I am enjoying setting my own schedule and not worrying about her needs. I'm delighted to hear that she is being responsible and doing well.
This evening they had a campfire, and Daughter challenged one of the counselors to a rap contest. According to CN, Daughter won. She said Daughter involved the others and it was a rap about faith. It was very hot today-- heat index was over 100. Daughter got overheated, but recovered.
CN said I am the only parent she called, but she knew I was worried, and she wanted me to know that Daughter is doing great. Tonight, I'm grateful. Tomorrow I won't be anticipating problems, waiting for the phone to ring. I am enjoying setting my own schedule and not worrying about her needs. I'm delighted to hear that she is being responsible and doing well.
A Silent Phone
Daughter couldn't take her cell phone to camp, so she can't call me. It's rare for her to make it through the day without calling me at least once. She's well known for that. She often asks me to come get her early, and even though I always say no, she continues to ask. Sometimes I think she just creates reasons to call me. It's like she has to check to make sure I'm still here. As of right now, I haven't seen or heard from her since I dropped off her medication at the camp at noon yesterday. I'm enjoying the break from the phone calls, though I must admit it's a bit weird.
Kitten misses her-- she slept with me last night, and yelled at me a bit when I got home at 9:00. By 10:30, she was biting my toes, trying to get my attention. The house is quiet, and it's nice. I like having things unlocked. It's wonderful change.
It looks like it's going to be sunny and hot most of the week. I'm sure Daughter is having a good time. I'm hoping for a productive week at church and home without the work and distractions Daughter brings into my life. I haven't had this kind of break since she went to diabetes camp 9 years ago. When she's been in the hospital she's still called, and I've had to make the 45 mile journey to visit her most evenings. I do miss her, but it's good. I know she's safe and that she is having a good time. Now to see how much I can accomplish today.
Kitten misses her-- she slept with me last night, and yelled at me a bit when I got home at 9:00. By 10:30, she was biting my toes, trying to get my attention. The house is quiet, and it's nice. I like having things unlocked. It's wonderful change.
It looks like it's going to be sunny and hot most of the week. I'm sure Daughter is having a good time. I'm hoping for a productive week at church and home without the work and distractions Daughter brings into my life. I haven't had this kind of break since she went to diabetes camp 9 years ago. When she's been in the hospital she's still called, and I've had to make the 45 mile journey to visit her most evenings. I do miss her, but it's good. I know she's safe and that she is having a good time. Now to see how much I can accomplish today.
Monday, June 6, 2011
The Gift of Time
When I got to the camp today and discovered I had forgotten her medication and would have to get it back by lunch so she would have her insulin, it really didn't bother me that much. It meant an extra 3 hours in the car, but it was okay. In fact, I viewed it as a gift. It was 3 hours when I couldn't do research for the sermon, respond to emails, or plan for this evening's meeting.
I prayed, I talked to my sister on the phone, and I enjoyed the drive. I drove through a fastfood restaurant for lunch, and then once I got to the church, I just stayed there until my meeting this evening, eating my planned lunch for supper. It was wonderful not to have to worry about Daughter. I am going to enjoy the gift of time: the time away to pray in the car today, and the time without Daughter this week. It truly is a great gift.
I prayed, I talked to my sister on the phone, and I enjoyed the drive. I drove through a fastfood restaurant for lunch, and then once I got to the church, I just stayed there until my meeting this evening, eating my planned lunch for supper. It was wonderful not to have to worry about Daughter. I am going to enjoy the gift of time: the time away to pray in the car today, and the time without Daughter this week. It truly is a great gift.
Belly Laugh of the Month
Daughter has been protesting about going to camp for months. She wouldn't go, I couldn't make her, it wasn't fair, I was trying to get rid of her, etc. Her protests just increased my resolve that she would go, but it hasn't been pleasant.
So today, as we're driving down the road, she said to herself, "Daughter, stop smiling. You're supposed to be mad." I don't remember the last time I laughed so hard.
When we got to camp almost 90 minutes later I was especially grateful for the laugh, as I realized I'd left all her medication on a kitchen chair. I dropped her off and came back home to get it. Instead of getting into the office by 11:00, it was after 2:00. But she's at camp already charming everyone in sight, and the food is unlocked in my kitchen. A little bit of heaven, and worth 6 hours on the road.
So today, as we're driving down the road, she said to herself, "Daughter, stop smiling. You're supposed to be mad." I don't remember the last time I laughed so hard.
When we got to camp almost 90 minutes later I was especially grateful for the laugh, as I realized I'd left all her medication on a kitchen chair. I dropped her off and came back home to get it. Instead of getting into the office by 11:00, it was after 2:00. But she's at camp already charming everyone in sight, and the food is unlocked in my kitchen. A little bit of heaven, and worth 6 hours on the road.
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