Depression

Okay. I've said it. Daughter and I are both struggling with depression right now. It's a part of our grief, but we are feeding off one another in our depressions, and I'm struggling to figure out a way to pull us both of it-- or at least get myself out of it.

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Daughter has been doing a lot of sleeping, and complaining about a variety of vague physical symptoms. When she's like this, her attitude sucks all the life and energy out of this house. I have spent the last 2 nights working on various cooking projects in the kitchen. She's spent the last 2 nights complaining about any task I ask her to do and "forgetting" to do about half of them. Last night I asked her to unload the dishwasher (it's not even a full size dishwasher). You'd have thought I'd asked her to take on the biggest job ever.

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Of course, my outlook is not helped by the fact that I have been experiencing a good bit of back and shoulder pain as a result of extended time spent standing and working at counter height. So while I'm keeping going through my pain, she's complaining about the smallest things. Last night she was "too sick" to take care of the clothes in the dryer. I informed her I was going to be too tired to take care of her insulin and pills or fix her meals if she didn't begin to do her fair share around the house.

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She slept for 2 hours when she got home yesterday, went to bed early last night, and still didn't want to get up this morning. My third call for her to get out of bed was none too pleasant. I told her with all the running I've been doing with her (softball game tonight) and her lack of help, the state of the house was really beginning to stress me out. She apologized. I pointed out she's been apologizing every morning and refusing to do any work every evening. She left here in tears.

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She came home and apologized again, and told me she had lots of time before the softball game to work around the house. So far she's put away clean laundry and dishes. I've begun cleaning off my desk, where important papers have gotten buried. Maybe I'll actually find one or two of them in my mining expedition this evening. Maybe she will start being cooperative every night. I will hope. I always hope.