Sunday Morning

I got over to the church a little later than normal this morning. I was making the rounds greeting people and making note of prayer requests when C walked in. She was going to play piano for the Wednesday night Lenten service this week. "I'm not going to be here Wednesday and neither is 3/4ths of the congregation. There's a tournament game. There's no one to play piano." I was in the process of recording the name of a seriously ill daughter-in-law, and dealing with the pieces of broken clay that were to be distributed during worship this morning.

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I looked at her and just said, "I can't deal with that right now." She vanished. After worship she had found someone to play, for which I am grateful. There are always those in the church who don't think the pastor should ever have personal troubles. We are supposed to be available and in top form 24/7. They resent it when family concerns divide our attention. It took several calls to find someone who would ride with me to the hospital on Friday. They had tickets for the high school basketball game, and couldn't miss that. There are times when I feel like I need to apologize for being human.

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I'm going to put my feet up for a few minutes, and then I'm meeting with the family to plan the funeral at 2:30 this afternoon. They are in the direction of the hospital, so I'll head over there after I see them. It will be a brief visit. Daughter was more subdued last night when I was there. In spite of my careful planning, there was miscommunication and I had to go to both hospitals and got there just as they were transferring her. I left the suitcase with her clothes at the psych hospital and visited with her briefly at the medical one. Apparently after I raised concerns about the male sitter, they switched and got a female one to sit with her. She wasn't left unsupervised at all.

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I gave her a hug, and she held on. I think she's beginning to recognize the implications of what she did. At least I hope so. I'll stop and see her today, but tomorrow I will stay away. I need to prepare the funeral and figure out Wednesday night and Sunday morning.

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Now I'm going to go put my feet up. If I'm lucky, I'll fall asleep for at least a few minutes.